I read Adam McHugh’s first book, Introverts in the Church, shortly after it was published in 2009. I had known for a long time that I was an introvert, but I hadn’t taken a direct look at the challenges and gifts that come along with this particular aspect who I am. I found the book to be an affirming and balanced look at the role personality types play in our quest to embrace our unique, God-given identities. So I was excited to pick up his new book, The Listening Life.
In The Listening Life, Adam McHugh explains that listening well—to others, to God, and to ourselves—does not come easily. It is difficult, often tiring work. Yet it is also enriching work that leads us closer to the lives of others and to the heart of God.
McHugh—an ordained Presbyterian minister and spiritual director—humbly examines the value of listening as a fellow learner in the “sacred art” of conversation. McHugh uses examples from his ministry, including his time serving as a hospice chaplain and his everyday experiences of building relationships. His bursts of humor are a highlight (especially if you take the time to read the pleasantly witty footnotes).
McHugh admits his own missteps as he outlines common listening approaches that can be harmful. One example is responding to someone’s expression of pain with a quick Scripture verse or platitude, an approach that can be more about telling them what to feel rather than actually letting them feel it with us.
“I have devoted and redevoted myself to listening because it is making me into the kind of person I want to be,” says McHugh. What kind of person is this? Someone who chooses patience over distraction, vulnerability over control, compassion over self-importance, and deep questions over fast answers. A “servant listener,” who pays attention to creation, makes time for prayerful solitude, and meditates on Scripture, but also bravely engages with others by “getting our feet dirty in the layered soil of their lives.” Simply put, a person who is becoming like Christ.
Ultimately, McHugh believes that listening is absolutely foundational to the lives of those who seek to follow Christ because it is a gift given by a listening God. To paraphrase 1 John 4:19: We listen because he first listened to us. We will never be perfect listeners, but the quest to become better is inseparable from our walk of faith. As McHugh says: “We learn how to listen because we want to learn how to love.”
The Listening Life is an observant, Scripture-led journey into practices that can reawaken us to our humanity and attune us to God’s leading in all areas of life.
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Listening is a bigger deal than we realize
A VERY thought provoking book. It is amazing to see how listening touches every part of life and what it really means. This is a timely read for me and so I took my time reading it pausing often to reflect and consider. I folded over pages I want to revisit and when i came to the end of the book discovered I may have folded over 1/2 of the book. I also found it validating in many ways as I am on a journey of writing my second book and Adam touched on numerous issues I am dealing with. Listening is a bigger deal than we realize and I aim to learn from it.
Top reviews from other countries
Jo
I knew I would love this book as soon as I knew it was ...
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on February 17, 2016